Until very recently, my husband and I didn’t celebrate Valentine’s Day. Occasionally, I’d say, “Happy Valentine’s Day” in much the same way I’d wish him a happy birthday. We rarely, however, went out to eat. He stopped buying me flowers years ago.

Until this year, we didn’t do these things for two reasons. One: we’re both practical people, and practical people don’t spend twice as much on flowers on Valentine’s Day just because everyone else does the same thing.

Two: until somewhat recently, I didn’t enjoy my husband’s company very much. Valentine’s Day was just a cruel reminder that I’d married the wrong person.

Now I no longer feel as if I’ve married the wrong person. My husband is right for me in every way. I love him more than ever. For the first time in years, I find myself wanting to celebrate this great day of love of ours. Here’s my new complication: money. We’re on the tightest budget imaginable.

So, as we’ve done in year’s past, we won’t go out to eat. He won’t buy me flowers. We will, however, celebrate Valentine’s Day with what I’m going to call Free Acts of Loving. Who needs flowers when there are back rubs to be had? Who needs dinner at a restaurant when there is wine to sip in bed? Who needs chocolate when there’s sex?

Who needs a store bought card when there’s Haiku? In my Win a Wii contest, I challenged all of you to write Haiku, which is three lines of poetry that do not rhyme. The first line contains 5 syllables, the second 7, and the third three. For my husband, I’ve written the following 5 stanza Valentine’s Haiku. (Note: we will be judging the contest next week. Stay tuned.)

Ode to Mr. Strong and Silent

I wake up sleepy.
I bitch and complain a lot.
You bring me latte.

I have a hard day.
I stare at the wall and cry.
You bring me wine.

My pants are too tight.
I ask you if I look fat.
You say I am beautiful.

I think bugs are gross.
You kill bugs and rodents.
I thank God for that.

I make you bacon.
I tolerate your mother.
You know I love you.